I’m a loner
November 29th, 2005 by Yvonne
I should be indulging into my t-shirt plannings, but here I am sulking on heartaches. Don’t be surprised. I may be a fighter, but fighters are at the mercy of emotions as well.
Have been surfing blogs this afternoon, when I came upon a few posts that hit me in the head. Many a times, I told people that nothing is impossible so long we put our hearts to it. But there was one thing I forgot. We cannot control another’s desire for us. All we can do is pray to God for that person to look our direction. That’s where I loose out. I may be blessed and gifted in many ways, but so what? I’ve no one to turn to when I’m sad, no one to hold me when I’m weak, no one to fight along, no one to embrace. This place seems empty at times. (see… yvonne is very much human)
At the same time, (unrelated) I’ve also been trying to get in contact with a friend. I don’t have any special feelings for him, but he’s one heck of a friend to have, and I would very much like to see him again. I’ve asked around and none of our mutual friends know where the heck he is. What the hell, do we really mean so little to him? The last time I saw him was at Cheryl’s birthday party last year. How thin he has grown since the first day I knew him. He would send me e-mail occasionally, but they’re nothing more than forwarded junks. Is he really so busy, that he can’t even find time to reply my mail? What an ass…
Should anyone of you out there know a person by the name Fong Yewin, 22 years old, alumni of SMSJ and IMU, Medical Student in New Zealand, part-time magician, please tell him that someone misses him back home.
*sigh* This world is so big.
Posted in Matters of the Heart |
November 30th, 2005 at 12:12 am
I hear most med students work really hard, practically around the clock. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s not seen a PC for years
November 30th, 2005 at 12:34 am
red face tomato on alert!!!
November 30th, 2005 at 4:11 am
Hey…
We are humans in which I won’t deny. We have series of heartaches… If not we wouldn’t be considered as a person with a heart right?
I hope you will feel better soon dear. *hugs*
November 30th, 2005 at 4:46 am
“The Malay Dilemma” revealing the weaknesses of malays. But did they do something to amend their weaknesses using the correct way, like work harder, compete equally etc?
They did with the fastest way, implementing unfair policies. How many of you all will agree that the policies are not benefiting the malays?
From the economy to the education system and to the society, all policies were meant to “close” their mind and body.
In Pak Lah announce that NEP will stay, as long as the gap between the poor and the rich exists. In a free economy, this will always be the case. How can the gap be narrowed if they do not work hard?
Just ask any economists how an economy works.
Let’s assume that they are trying to perform transferring wealth to the poor in this way, it would be better to practice socialism or communism, where everything belongs to the country and no personal assets are allowed.
After 35 years of NEP, how has it benefited the country as a whole?
No one benefited in the end except those in power.
November 30th, 2005 at 9:23 am
For so many times, we can only put our hearts at thing, and the outcome is so not within our control. Especially when we deal with another human being, they can make us happy and make us sad.
Like they all said, no matter what the outcome is, do it anyway (as your heart told you to).
November 30th, 2005 at 12:47 pm
This country would be a great country if there is no division of races. With its richness of natural resources, Malaysia should be one among the most developed nation in Asia.
Bitter to say, all those money lost to corrupt politicians and cronies, and unprofitable projects.
This is what saddens me as Malaysian.
However, I do believe a brain drain is inevitable. I believe it is happening. As a student in long-ago school, I see it every year. Each and every year after the holidays, there are a few less people in class. Why? Their parents emigrated down under West.
I left the country in the 90s because of the injustices in Malaysia perpetrated by Umno. I made my fortune and no returned home but I thought Mahathir had somehow managed to turn the mindset of Umno around into focusing on global competition, instead of petty race-based competition.
Now I am certain that those in power want the affirmative action policies to continue, not because these policies benefit the general malay population, but because these policies give Umno the right to continue to plunder the country.
Legalised theft is what they are after, and if anyone dares speak out, they just tell you to leave the country so that they can continue their plunder.
It’s sad, but my children don’t have to live through this injustice. They can go anywhere they want in the world, and I encourage them.
There are many people who made big names as Malaysians only when they are treated better in other countries, not because they are Malaysians but because they are treated as one of their own.
That’s explain why they choose not come back. Treatment was so good that they offered their family to emigrate over there.
Since Umno is playing the race cards openly, the coming future for non-malays is suffering through endurance. How many more years should we Malaysians suffer? It is not only the non-malays but also the poor malays struggling for survival in isolated villages.
Anyway, these people voted with their feet and wrote about their experience. They wanted to tell you about this country and how its government discriminated its minority people.
I can feel they love this country too but this country or rather this government did not love them. I can also feel their sadness and how things are turning for their malay brothers and sisters who are getting weaker and weaker in this globalised world, and all this is Umno’s fault.
They realised if this is not stop immediately, this country will eventually go down the drain like those fourth world banana republics.
Their ancestors have helped this country to fight for independence and even fought off Japanese invaders but our government has never been grateful and instead discriminated against them to the hilt.
They also saw that they have become second-class citizens in their country of birth, and were very disappointed when Indonesia labours can become first class citizens whereas foreign spouses of non-malays took years just to get a PR. Even terrorists like Hambali and Abu Bakar can become PR holders easily. Something is definitely wrong with this country.
Here maybe you are malay and oblivious to others who are suffering and as a Muslim yourself, is this injustice reconcilable to the tenets of Islam?
Tony Gunawan also voted with his feet and went on to become USA’s first world badminton doubles champion. Instead of helping his original country to badminton glory, he helped another country to become a potent rival.
The same could be said of our citizens who voted with their feet. Many went to Singapore and worked for companies that became our competitors. If our country and government has been kind to some of its citizens, this additional competition wouldn’t have been created. I hope the present government will realise its folly and there is no substitute to real meritocracy.
The non-malays don’t want everything but only fairness and social justice, a very tenet of your malays great religion. If you can’t even subscribe to the tenets of your own religion, I am afraid you may be branded a hypocrite and a very racist one at that.
It is not true that there will be no policy that can keep every race happy.
Only the person who thinks that he should be treated better than others would object to a policy that is fair to all.
That feeling of “entitlement” is created by politicians who have found a convenient way to retain power in parliamentary democracy.
As a grass root, I hope that all Malaysians will live in harmony and work towards a better tomorrow, a better environment for the children.
November 30th, 2005 at 1:42 pm
First of all, are we (the non-malays, that is) really to believe that the government will abolish or tone down the New Economic Policy in the near future? We must be realistic, if you have the right to buy a property at a discount and have scholarships for your children, would you let go of these rights?
With Chinese population dwindling in Malaysia, what needs to be done depends on the Chinese themselves.
There is nothing wrong with the brain drain. In fact, we should encourage our children to move to Singapore, Taiwan, China etc. if we disagree with Malaysian government policies that are based on race and religion.
When it comes to the matter of the dwindling number of Chinese Malaysians, we should talk about quality, not quantity.
We should resolve why the Chinese-Malaysian population is reducing. Official figures have more than one million Chinese Malaysians emigrating over the past 25 years. Why did they emigrate? I am sure the government knows.
Straight A students can’t get scholarships or university places. Nothing new, it is been that way for the past 35 years. Nowadays, even enlightened malay Malaysians are speaking up on this injustice. The MCA and Gerakan? Busy making money from private colleges.
What is so great about having TAR College or Utar which took more than 35 years of begging? Why should it be so difficult to set up an independent university when we have scores of public ones?
While we push young talented people away, other countries notably Singapore, the US and Australia welcome them with open arms.
Is it logical that we drive away our young talented ones and then invite retired Mat Sallehs to live here and exploit our low-cost of living?
Singapore’s success in particular owes much to these ex-Malaysians or their descendants including Hon Sui Sen, Goh Keng Swee, Goh Chok Tong, just to name a few.
About 30 percent of top management in both Singapore’s government and corporate sector are ex-Malaysians. We export them so that Singapore can compete with, and then whack us.
Korea and Taiwan, both way behind us in the 70s and 80s are now way ahead. Thailand is breathing down our necks.
Sadly, there is just no integrity in the nation’s leadership.
November 30th, 2005 at 9:01 pm
eh…i know yewin! but sadly i dun have his contact…and i dun think he knows me personally also…he was my scout senior…=)
December 12th, 2005 at 11:57 am
I have always seen Mahathir as a personification of all that is evil? An overkill description but then if you put down the damage he has done to democracy than you would understand.
He suppressed press freedom, emasculated the judiciary, abhorred free speech, detained his opponents under the ISA, and made the entire police force and judges to his pet poodle.
The country lost billions of ringgit under him. Never forget how he humiliated Anwar. His own Umno ministers feared him and never dared question his opinions and views.
Print and electronic media never had one critical word about him.
He was made into a demi-God. He was a virtual dictator.
Now he talks with his second tongue because he is despised by his party. He is actually a nobody that even the Proton management ignores him. He deserves even a more severe ignominious treatment and an exit to hell.
Looks like we are pouring too much adulation on Mahathir for the Twin-Tower, MSC, highway etc. Any PM worth his salt would have done them as Malaysia had to progress with the rest of the world. With the money we had in the coffers, it was possible to implement all these programs.
But look at his colossal failures - tangible and non-tangible. He dismantled all democratic institutions and the rule of law! He lost billions in countless business ventures and megalomaniac dreams.
If he had been a good PM as some claim him to be, then the present PM would have had no difficulty taking over the reins.
Today Pak Lah is running hither and because Mahathir did not lay a strong democratic foundation for its continuation. The transition would have been smooth had Mahathir been a “good” PM.
Remember Mahathir was No 1, No 2 and No 3 in the old government. There was a vacuum left after him. Thus, Pah Lah’s current predicament!
Ketuanan Melayu and Islamization will go hand in hand and surely this cannot be a good ingredient into to take - “the nation to great heights in terms of achievement and prosperity, well respected and a choice destination for business, education, holidays and immigration”.
MSC: A good idea, but lacks implementation. Our International Advisory Panel said so, and surprisingly, what was done and what was the result? They are still saying we lack the manpower, and most of the knowledge workers here! Why?
National car: Did you know that we are subsidizing a corporation’s immature venture overseas? Did you know that Proton costs dirt cheap in London? How is it ever possible that our Malaysia living standards can increase when we are subsidizing Proton, and indirectly, the British?
Highways: If we didn’t use the money on the white elephants in mega projects, perhaps we will be driving toll-free roads today?
Authoritarian government carries a huge risk if the objectives and goals for the country and her ordinary people are not achieved. Ordinary people will suffer for many generations to come as a result of failures and losses e.g. Indonesia, Laos and many African countries.
December 12th, 2005 at 11:58 am
The non-malays have heard this one before - If you think that Malaysia not good, please go out this country.
Umno has been brought up to think they are the prince of the land.
Every time they get cornered, Umno will tell the other race to go out where they belong. I think Umno must change their thinking or they will pull down the country to the middle age.
So far there is no Umno leader that can lead them to be modern 21st century citizens.
Rather Umno is anti this or anti that. There is no forward looking and thinking to break free perspective.
Malaysia developed nation on year 2020?
The problem with Malaysia ministers is that they are mostly underachievers academically!
That is the reason why they simply speak without logic and reasons. This is also the very reason that I admire Lim Kit Siang, Karpal, etc, who can debate intelligently with those monkeys who never bother to understand what is uttered.
Just compare the resume of Malaysia ministers with that from our southern neighbour! Then you will understand.
I know their prime minister has a first class honors in science from Cambridge if I am not mistaken. The rest of his cabinets are very highly qualified. Hence you don’t hear nonsense from them.
For your information, some Malaysia ministers would not be at all qualified for even an assistant post!
Our country leaders, not necessary meaning the prime minister, but overall people in power, people of authority etc, have no integrity, no moral, no self respect and most of no accountability and responsibility.
Let’s not compare with other countries, as no countries have perfect leaders, but what they have is integrity.
When they do something wrong and they know it is wrong, nobody need to tell them to resign, they won’t say our Malaysia usual line “Nobody can resign me except the prime minister” - we should call this the ball-less line.
If you have integrity and honest enough, you should just resign.
This is why Malaysia is moving backward. With this kind of ministers who are not willing to tackle the root of the issue, but instead blaming others for exposing bad news and sweeping things under the carpet - what hope can you foresee for Malaysia in the future.
Perhaps we should have “Look Africa” policy, rather than “Look East” policy - since a lot of things are similar between Malaysia and African countries except oil.
December 12th, 2005 at 12:00 pm
Well it just appeared on the google page when I searched for racism subject this afternoon.
I have been in New Zealand for 15 years and I have no intention to go back to Malaysia simply because there is an equal opportunity here for everyone, and I don’t feel less ranked in the society.
I am not sure if I am part of the cream but I do have both bachelor and master degrees, and I am currently serving the New Zealand community.
I love the place I was brought up in (Sungai Petani) and the memory I had when I was attending primary and secondary schools, but the way the Chinese and Indian people are treated by the Malaysia government is just flawed.
I have no intention to go back, until I see a non-malay PM.
Way to go!
Let’s celebrate the human spirit that strives against the odds!
Persistence definitely bears fruits! And certainly they are sustainable and cherish-able!
Universal truths!
One got to be prepared to look for challenges, in any areas of your interest, beyond the shores of Malaysia.
Malaysia’s economy is very small and unsophisticated.
Australia’s economy is bigger than all of the South East Asia countries combined. Imagine USA and Europe!
December 18th, 2005 at 2:13 pm
I have always seen Mahathir as a personification of all that is evil? An overkill description but then if you put down the damage he has done to democracy than you would understand.
He suppressed press freedom, emasculated the judiciary, abhorred free speech, detained his opponents under the ISA, and made the entire police force and judges to his pet poodle.
The country lost billions of ringgit under him. Never forget how he humiliated Anwar. His own Umno ministers feared him and never dared question his opinions and views. Print and electronic media never had one critical word about him.
He was made into a demi-God. He was a virtual dictator.
Now he talks with his second tongue because he is despised by his party. He is actually a nobody that even the Proton management ignores him. He deserves even a more severe ignominious treatment and an exit to hell.
Looks like we are pouring too much adulation on Mahathir for the Twin Tower, MSC, highway etc. Any PM worth his salt would have done them as Malaysia had to progress with the rest of the world. With the money we had in the coffers, it was possible to implement all these programs.
But look at his colossal failures - tangible and non-tangible. He dismantled all democratic institutions and the rule of law! He lost billions in countless business ventures and megalomaniac dreams.
If he had been a good PM as some claim him to be, then the present PM would have had no difficulty taking over the reins.
Today Pak Lah is running hither and because Mahathir did not lay a strong democratic foundation for its continuation. The transition would have been smooth had Mahathir been a “good” PM.
Remember Mahathir was No. 1, No. 2 and No. 3 in the old government. There was a vacuum left after him. Thus, Pah Lah’s current predicament!
National car: Did you know that we are subsidizing a corporation’s immature venture overseas? Did you know that Proton costs dirt cheap in London? How is it ever possible that our Malaysia living standards can increase when we are subsidizing Proton, and indirectly, the British?
MSC: A good idea, but lacks implementation. Our International Advisory Panel said so, and surprisingly, what was done and what was the result? They are still saying we lack the manpower and most of the knowledge workers here! Why?
Highways: If we didn’t use the money on the white elephants in mega projects, perhaps we will be driving toll-free roads today?
Ketuanan Melayu and Islamization will go hand in hand and surely this cannot be a good ingredient into to take - “the nation to great heights in terms of achievement and prosperity, well respected and a choice destination for business, education, holidays and immigration”.
Authoritarian government carries a huge risk if the objectives and goals for the country and her ordinary people are not achieved. Ordinary people will suffer for many generations to come as a result of failures and losses e.g. Indonesia, Laos and many African countries.
December 18th, 2005 at 2:15 pm
My company was formed with a “muhibbah” mindset and we the board of directors and shareholders were bent on providing jobs to all races without prejudice. The company was registered with the Treasury to enable us to be a registered vendor with Petronas.
Now, I understand, Petronas prefers to deal with only 100 percent bumi companies. Those non-bumi contractors who have worked and grown with Petronas over the years will feel cheated.
What NEP are we talking about? What irks the public - especially the non-bumis - is that government policies are never monitored and each time, the elite class cries out for more goodies and wants the NEP maintained. The government of the day just succumbs to such pressures.
Will those super-rich bumis share their wealth with the poor bumis in the kampungs? Will the government of the day be bold enough to say enough is enough?
Look at our corruption index. Look at our educational system. Look at our unemployed graduates. Look at the “untouchable” ministers tainted by corruption. What is our PM doing about this?
Divide and rule is what the government cares as along as they are in power. The loss of trust and suspicion does not happen overnight.
Do we honest Malaysians think that we are going to achieve the developed country status by the year 2020 with racial, religious and ethnic segregation and discrimination by the government?
Our PM has a very important role to play. If he keeps on keeping mum on the issues at hand and allows them to take its own course, in no time, the country will plunge deeper into oblivion.
The failures of the NEP since its inception over the last 35 years must be addressed and for this the government has to be realistic and bold. Not only for all Malaysians but also for the future generations.
December 20th, 2005 at 11:27 am
In reality, although NEP is officially dead, some of the policies remain favoring one race regardless of need (example: education, housing, loan facility etc).
The non-bumis feels that NEP is holding them back (this is true in many cases) in order for the bumis to catch up.
It is sad to think some bumis believe the best way to catching up with the non-bumis is to hold non-bumis back.
Malaysia has lost many able non-bumis to other competing countries (brain drain) and is unable to see the relative advantage of retaining this pool of talents to help them.
What an irony that I experienced less discrimination in foreign country than in my own soil?
After my studies in USA, I applied for job there and to my surprise it is unlawful to be discriminatory, employers do not ask your race and religion, and the good things, employment is based sorely on merits regardless of your background, a lot of my friends stay back because the incentives are excellent and the R&D facilities are cutting edge reputation, universities there are really centers for breeding new ideas unlike in Malaysia local universities, where freedom of thoughts are controlled by Acts.
Frankly I have no idea how we can compete with them when our “think outside the box” culture is oppressed. We say one thing but we do the opposite, the government is sending the wrong signal. In this country, even we have the hardware, we lack human-ware.
Border has no meanings nowadays, talents will go where they are demand and appreciated, and one day globalization will break down our Malaysia affirmative actions whether we like it or not.
While I submit that Malaysia is a net loser in this global “brain drain”, I think the country has to re-look at its programs to stem the outflow. The sad truth is that we are attracting the “lower skilled” or “unskilled” types.
Malaysia is the only country in the world where special privileges are shamelessly given to, and accepted by the majority of the population.
December 29th, 2005 at 3:23 am
The problem with us is that our country is run by politicians who pretend to be knowledgeable and competent, and when they are not sure, they hire half baked consultants, who are out to make a fast buck.
What a way to end 2005 - Proton and MAS threatening to becoming dinosaurs through poor management and political interference.
If the government had learn to apply the concept of meritocracy and shut up the bumbling interferences by politicians who don’t know what to say, maybe we won’t see all this today.
How much can we be involved? Nothing. All does is reveal our anger and frustrations and 2005 will end with the government no wiser than before.
Shame on these so-called leaders who only know how to put the blames on others rather than resign with dignity (if they still have some).
In this Bolehland, GLC invest in business not looking into profitability. Even it is on the loosing side they will still go ahead.
You know why? They try to create some activity which involved huge money transaction where they can take some out for their own pockets during the transaction.
Who cares the company will lose since Malaysians will pay for it. This is widely practised and you can see so many stalled projects in GLC.
Sooner or later our income tax will go up to pay for all these losses and some might say easy money for others who are privileged.
Why should they go for transparency when it will be detrimental to them, as it will expose more of their dirty laundry.
Better to keep it under wraps for now. Forget about Vision 2020 and whatever visions. All talk only.
Look at China now. They even hauled up those people who are guilty of mismanagement of funds and appropriate actions been taken.
For us? As long as we got connection we can live another day.
We will definitely give them time but normally new GLC management team come in messed thing up and then left the shit behind. Another badge come in and repeat the same thing.
It is like a routine, time after time and yet they cannot perform but will try to “arbitrage” from their cheap management skills.
How many resources and time are we afford to lose? They are real thrash to society.
Just a matter of time all these will become episodes of silence. People in Bolehland always have short memory. That is why BN always win.
Let’s hope that 2006 will be a really better New Year.
January 11th, 2006 at 12:31 am
[…] So you’ve read this e-classfied of mine, searching for a Malaysian guy named Fong Yewin dead or alive. Now I’m telling you, I found him! […]
March 3rd, 2006 at 2:02 pm
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March 13th, 2006 at 12:35 pm
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March 30th, 2006 at 11:56 am
Just for your info:
Yes, can understand why all this hatred but, if you do study government policies
they’re somewhat pro-”bumiputras” of that nation. Just look to places like Sri Lanka
where the most dominant race is the Sinhalese; policies, etc, are pro-Sinhalese
not withstanding other races within that nation such as the Tamils, Muslims &
Malays. (Yes, there are Malays in that place & they’re not the dominant race, just as in
the case of Malays in South Africa, the UK, etc).
Other examples include well… I don’t want to name names but just
think abt it. Any nation at all, will have the dominant race doing what they can to
ensure that their race remains so. We’ve got to live with it, be clear with our objectives.
Seems that majority of replies indicate high regard for that place down south… Well,
did you know that in recent months, at least 2 persons have been convicted or at least
charged for setting up racist/ anti govt blogs?
Last words: The human is the best of creations. We have the intelligence and drive to
overcome challenges, etc. Why let such issues upset us instead of focusing on our personal
progress? Japan is probably the most advanced nation in Asia because it has been tested with
many challenges & overcame them with rigour.
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