Article: Why handicap toilets are important
Ever since Singaporean blogging princess, Xia Xue wrote about her opinion regarding handicap toilets, I’ve been having nightmares about the times I was a orthopaedically handicap as well. In fact, while writing this post, I really feel like crying. But I have to hold back my tears, I have to be strong, yes I can and I have to.
I’d like to point out that handicap toilets are here for two reasons…
- The extra space for easy access and bars to grip for balance
- For emergency
I can understand that mundane people may not be aware of reason number two, because it’s a seldom highlighted issue. I can assure you that it is one of the major problems faced by orthopaedically handicaps. Please remember this very important fact. Spine injury means damaged nerves, and possibly nerves that control our bladder and bowel activity. If someone’s immobile due to spine injuries, chances are, their bladder and bowels are weak as well.
Until this day, three years after my spine surgery, I still cringe at the memory of the lack of control over my bladder and bowel. When it happened, I feel like barging the doors of those toilets that were in use. Not because of anger, but because I could simply loose myself anytime and anywhere. When that happens, who will clean up after me?- MY MOTHER. We had to face the mess that I created while the able-bodied occupants of those handicap toilets walked away just like that.
And if that’s not bad enough, remember that I was also quite physically disabled. The nerves in my body were still very much damaged. I couldn’t stand up still without holding onto something for balance, and I could simply knock down anything that was in my way. This only made my bladder control worse than you can possibly imagine. Because by worrying about my balance, I forgot to concentrate on controlling my bladder and bowel movements. Oh… I have not mentioned about the mental trauma, how the situation made me short-tempered and difficult.
Thanks to my mother who was so willing to put up with all these crap. If it had been someone else, they might have just walked away , leaving me in that pit. Another person who can prove this is Elena Tong or better known as “DJcarmen”. I’m very damn sure she can still remember about those difficult times that I faced. I lost myself many times, anytime and anywhere, even in school where everyone was eyeing at me One of the reason was because those handicap toilets that were supposed to be for emergency, were occupied by able-bodied humans who can afford to wait for another minute or two. So many friends have walked past me without helping, but Elena was there. Thank you so much, Elena.
I’m not 100% sure if this problem was just me, or does it apply to all orthopaedically handicaps. But as written here, Peter Tan faces the same problem as well. He claims a spastic bladder to be the reason. If not properly managed, it may damage the kidneys as well. I have all the reason to believe him because I’ve gone through it myself. Whenever I didn’t make to the toilet on time, I either loose myself or everything seemed to have been pushed back and my bladder hurt. This reminds me of the time when the nurses in hospital did not attend to my painful abdomen immediately. When they finally did, the catheter and urine bag was filled with urine contaminated by thick blood. It was so bloody, as though I was the recipient of blood donation. And you know what? The doctor-on-call had the wits to ask me if those were menses. If that’s all it takes to become a doctor, I would be in white tunics myself. bah!
So in conclusion, those handicap toilets have been built with the handicaps in mind. Please remember that being a physically handicap is just one of the many problems that we face. If we do loose ourselves because we can no longer wait, would you be so kind to clean up after us?
Spine injury means damaged nerves, and possibly nerves that control our bladder and bowel activity.
It’s not whether any handicaps are using those toilets, but rather, what if someone needs to use it urgently while you’re inside. By being unthoughtful, you’ll be the cause of MUCH difficulties and TRAUMA for others less lucky than you. PLEEEEASE remember this. Oh drats… I’m already in tears now.
p/s: Not all people with spine injuries are wheelchair bounds. I was still facing urinal inconsistency even when I could stand up and walk. That said, handicap toilets are for those with physical and neurological disabilities. Peter Tan may have been slightly rude in his words. But who can blame him, for all the difficulties that he has been through in the last 20 years? As I’ve mentioned earlier, my 6-month ordeal made me short-tempered and difficult, which is nothing compared to what Peter Tan has to face. Please understand. Don’t wait until you’re face-to-face with spinal injuries before you can learn to be accomodating, for heaven’s sake.
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*hands yvonne a cyber tissue*
Hi Yvonne,I’m so sorry to read about your predicament. I must say I am guilty of the verdict for I once used a toilet for special people like you because I had to ask my son to come in as well coz he was in a stroller. They didn’t have a special place for mothers with babies there. Anyhow, since today you mentioned about friends, I thought you’d like to read my blog today dedicated especially for friends. Keep on writing. I truly enjoy reading your articles here. I’m sure its really hard, but it’s all worth it.
Thanks for this post. It’s good.
Dear,
This post is really good. And yes, I hope others will understand what you are trying to say here.
Also, everyone should learn how to be more thoughtful…
*runs off to Yvonne and hugs her tightly*
Hi Yvonne, I fully understand what you are trying to say here . That is because I am disabled due to a recurrence brain tumour since four yeas ago. I only hope much more people would be more thoughtful.As a matter of fact, till today I haven’t found a public venue where the facilities are entirely disable friendly.
putri I think it is okay for people with toddlers to use the disabled toilets, but I noticed those little children seats in handicap toilets that come with safety belts as well. But if there’s a better choice, I rather not use them.
kit welcome to my blog. well, we’ve to SEARCH for toilets, that can be so hidden these days. How can they actually expect the handicaps to look for toilets all over the place? By the way, would you tell me more about your tumor?
gawd..i’m bein’ mentioned…*feels that celebrity status all over again* :P~
hey dear…it was a nightmare…yea…but in another sense…both of us learnt a lot from that surgery u went to. i don’t think i need to remind you bout our lessons…but hey…it was harsh…but an eye opener :)~
it wasn’t tough helpin’ u out…but it was tough knowin’ the difficulities and the stress u’re going through. i could never forget the days…we had to rush to the toilet…n how it was either bein’ washed or was in a total mess…*freaks to the thought*
no matter how hard times was…n i’m sure..time’s gonna get harder soon…just remember that i’m always there to support you…morally, spiritually…n of course physically. the hardships i have to go through…is nothing compared to the friendship n lessons i get in return…
i dont think i’ll ever mind doin’ it again n again…cause there’s nothing more precious than knowin’ someone is always there when i need to talk…or someone to tell it straight to my face…
thank you for the friendship, the sisterhood…n the times we shared together is always memorable…:)~
djcarmen awww.. that’s so nice of you, dear. So happens that I’m reading this in the morning, so I’m gonna feel woozy for the whole day! I agree with what you said there. We’ve been through a lot hardships together, but what we get in return is worth more than can be said. You know what, Elena, you’ll be in my mind no matter I’m happy or sad. cheers!
Hi yvonne. i’ve a confession to make. i’ve used disabled toilets before. but i will not from this day onwards. i’m really sorry if i caused someone else to suffer. i guess xia xue is just one really bull headed young girl who doesn’t know what she is doing…and has trouble admitting her mistakes. don’t worry… have faith in humans! i think the majority of people are more considerate…or possibly uncomfortable using a disabled toilet. anyway. thanks for enlightening me. at least here’s one less inconsiderate person.
Well ,
1- it’s original size was 5cm in diameter.
2- the incision surgery was done in Nov 1998 ,it is benign.Six months after that I got back to work.
3 In the end of year 2000 the doctor recommended that I do a laser surgery as a follow up.
4-In June 2001 I experience acute epilepsy during lunch with colleaques.
5- After that the doctor prescripe huge dose of steroids but since then I have became a epilepsy and paralysis.
KitThank for sharing with me. Do you mean that the tumour was not entirely removed during the invasive surgery, that a follow-up surgery was needed in 2000? If so, how is the tumour now? Is it still there? I’ll be praying for you!
According to my neurosurgeon eventhough the tumour was removed but because of its original size there appeared to be some residue near the aorta.Luckilly there is only the operation scar which is affecting my nerves from working properly.Unfortunately the neurosurgeon also said that there is not much we can do about a scar in the brain.
u know…i’m the worse in science..hated it so much!!!!
but yvonne pratically got me readin’ a lil here n there bout neuro n stuffs…its not somethin’ i’ll ever study…but now i’ve a lil small knowledge in it :P~
but…scar in a brain??? o.O is that possible?? n will there be anymore possible damage due to the scar??
PS: a lil blur here…this is never one of my subjects :)~
Kit Thanks again for sharing. Yeah, Elena, scarring in the brain is possible. And like all other injuries, we’ve to depend on nature to heal it. But scarring in the brain are harder to heal and the problem that can arise varies greatly. I have scarring tissues as well. My damaged facial nerve is an example of it.
ahhh…now that makes more sense…
gawd…i’ve lots of scars…wonder if i have any in my brain…since i’m not thinkin’ right these days…kinda crazy…
or am i crazy all the time??
Thanks for the post, Yvonne, not mincing your words, putting the truth behind the real need “as it is”. Wow.
And, good on you, dJcarmen, for standing by and being there for Yvonne. Such friends, are always so valuable to find, and so rare.
Cheers to both of you!
Oh- and, hehe, should anything come at you out of this post, I’m on your side, too.
djcarmen I don’t know about that. Perhaps you might want to consult a psychiatrist about that.
Yiliang Thanks for your support, as always.
Yes, Peter was rude but when one is trapped in a wheelchair with so many health related problems, it is no wonder he got mad and said things he shouldn’t have said. I think the current tense situation on the subject of toilets for the disabled can be summed in this Chinese saying, ‘if the needle is not poking you in the skin, you won’t feel the pain.’
yiliang: its more of a wonder to learn from her…its harder to find such friends :)~
yvonne: yea..guess i should. thank god yiliang’s not one…if not…*hmm* :P~
Yvonne, so sorry to hear what you had gone through. Have faith that good people will come our path if we turn to the Lord.
Hi, can I link this to my blog?
Thanks
Hi Yvonne,
I have a few friends with similar problems that you have. I use crutches as I had polio and now suffering from arthritic pain in the hip. I use the accessible toilet and one or two times after using, a person in a wheelchair who is obviously in urgent need to use the toilet would glare at me as I go out. They have the right as I could use the ladies toilets myself. But I alwasy have problem opening doors and the toilets are often too small to manouvre. Hence, a lot of people use the accessible toilets including parents with babies. In very busy public places in the UK, they often have two or more toilets for disabled people and one or two of those would have nappy changing facilities in them. A few places have special rooms for nappy change.
I think mothers like Putri should ask for more nappy change area built.
All the best to you Yvonne.
seroja well, I believe that accessible toilets aren’t just for those who can’t walk at all, so if your mobility is affected in some ways, I think you have every right to use them. As for those glares, I suppose it’s just a bad time that a handicap was in urgent need too. Yes, I do agree that there should be more than one accessible toilet. In fact, I think our toilets need to be improved, whereby the society should start thinking more about their existence. In singapore, they have a toilet association that monitor all toilets to make sure they’re kept in standard. And finally, thanks for writing here. cheers!
I couldnt agree more!